”A woman is like a teabag. You never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt
How do you rate a book like this? When the author's life in the church makes me volcanically angry? But when I also feel so relieved that she managed to escape from fundamentalist Christianity and fine peace and happiness?
Evangelical Christians do a lot of fulminating about sick society “grooming" children, but they have their version of it and it's so harmful for women and their children. Equating femininity with marriage and motherhood, nothing else. Mandating that the husband must make all the decisions and that he can expect his wife to do as she is told. To hell with that! There's a reason that they oppose sex education, abortion, and contraception—all those things give girls and women information on how to control their own lives and bodies. Why God wouldn't want that is less clear. What is clear is that these men want to be controlling assholes.
I grew up going to an evangelical church and had exactly the same mixed feelings about it that the author did. However, I had a supportive mother who expected me to educate myself and to grow up before choosing a husband. Turns out I loved education and never did find a guy that was worth marrying. I asked Mom at one point if she was disappointed with my choices and she said, “You're the happiest of my children. Don't change.” I'm so lucky to have had such a sensible mother.
I am glad that this woman is so committed to exposing the abusive nature of her first marriage and the religious milieu that she lived in. If this book speaks to you, I would also recommend Educated by Tara Westover or Beyond Belief: My Secret Life Inside Scientology and My Harrowing Escape by Jenna Miscavige Hill. Although Hill's book relates to Scientology, it explores similar themes.
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